Healing on Valentine's Day: A Guide for Those Going Through a Breakup

Coping with Valentine's Day After a Breakup

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Relationships typically end for very good reasons. Often, we know we made the right decision, but can still feel emotional on special occasions. Valentine’s day can be particularly difficult for people who find themselves single following a breakup.

If you’re coping with the aftermath of a breakup, consider these 3 tips to help you cope with Valentines Day this year.

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1. Self-Reflection: Remembering the Reasons Your Relationship Ended

Consider writing a letter to yourself about the reasons your relationship wouldn’t work out if you were to re-establish it today. Consider acknowledging the good pieces as well as the difficult ones in the relationship. End the letter with how your life is different now with a focus on what’s improved since the relationship ended.

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2. Celebrating the Richness of Other Relationships in Your Life

Celebrate the other types of love in your life- Consider your platonic loves: your best friendships, your children, your pets. Take time to reflect on the richness of your life outside of romantic love. Nurture these other relationships.

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3. Loving You First: A Guide to Focusing on Self-Love

Focus on self-love. How do you fill your own cup? What makes you come alive? Think about the ways in which you can honour and love yourself on Valentines Day. Think about whether there was anything you gave up during your last relationship and re-engage with that activity. Reclaim aspects of yourself that have gone by the wayside while you prioritized your former partner.

Breakups ae painful. That pain can be felt even more acutely when it seems everyone around you is celebrating love. To combat loneliness, remember that romantic love is only one type of love. Partake in celebrating all the other types of love – love for yourselves and the important relationships you have in your life.  

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About the Author

Emily Bushell, M.A. Counselling Psychology
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Registered Counselling Therapist, Canadian Certified Counsellor Supervisor & EMDRIA Approved Consultant | Practice Owner & Clinical Director
Emily Bushell is a Registered Counselling Therapist who is passionate about fostering resilience and wellness with her clients. Emily believes that all people are capable of achieving stability and growth in their lives. Before becoming a founding member of our Wholetherapy Private Therapy Practice, Emily worked as a Clinical Counsellor with Coast Mental Health and as a Concurrent Disorders Specialist with Fraser Health Authority in British Columbia. Emily worked in a variety of settings in the mental health system including treatment centres, outreach teams, methadone clinics and outpatient care. Upon moving home to Nova Scotia, Emily decided to open her own private practice in order to work with her community from a different perspective.

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